Don't get me wrong. I'm not the total girlie-girl who cant take the trash out or use a Phillips screwdriver, but since those X+Y chromosomes are around, hell...let them put those genes to some good use. :)
Here's a thought - even if I know that "Assembly [is] required," why do I get so annoyed at the idea of having to put furniture together? I mean, when I bought it, I knew I'd have to put the work in eventually, right?
[Stay with me - I have a point...]
I watched the movie "He's just not that into you" and I must say, I was very impressed with how balanced the story was (not just targeting or bashing one gender). I really enjoyed the movie. [Yah, for a great movie rental.:)]
Anyway...
The movie briefly touched on the age old subject of settling for what you're not getting in a mate while hoping that they'd change for the better. Well, I had a conversation with my friend "Cynthia" who had a date with a gentleman, who (she later found out) had some baggage. Not significant (initially) - but enough to make a girl reconsider another date.
First date: WONDERFUL. Dinner, lots of conversation (3hrs), he looked great...basically the ideal first date, minus any awkward moments, anxious wonders, or inappropriate expectations.
After the first date, Cynthia was optimistic. They talked on the phone and he said, "I see our second date as us just hanging out at home and watching movies." [Insert crowd booing, hissing, car screeches, the nines.]
To my friend, she asked herself, "why would he tease me with a spectacular first date and then not wanna keep the momentum going?" Now she admitted that she was not asking him to spend tons of money but asked what happened to "wining and dining" a gal, or as the older folk call it "courting?"
After they talked a bit (remember this is all before their second date), here's his story...
- He relocated to California in pursuit of a "job in the business."
- He moved here with no housing, lives in a shelter, and all of his minimum wages (from his two jobs) went toward food and living expenses.
- He has a child, which he had not seen in several months (and to his own admission was not able to send money or support the child due to the relocation). But take note - Cynthia did meet him in the club so he's got money for something. I guess a shot of Patron and a good Jay-Z song is hard to pass up. I digress...
- He's attended at least five trade schools. With this recent relocation, it's his sixth new career. I guess he's literally a "jack of all trades."
His story would have either invoked empathy or struck the resemblance of someone who's unfocused and cheap. Unfortunately, it was the latter.
Cynthia told me, " I cant deal with an IKEA brand, I need a ready-made man or better yet a man in the vain of Home Depot's motto, 'you can do it. we can help.' "
I hollered. The only problem...he needed too much help.
Here is my perspective: At least he told her that "assembly [was] required." She was informed well before she was five months or one-year invested and in love. At least she knew what she was getting and had the immediate option to either "put it together" or return it.
That guy had a rough story, but I must say...at least he told her. Part of me feels bad for him...
Mickey
Couldn't agree more. The signs are usually there but we still ignore them.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you on that; at least the guy was honest and I could say he might be sincere in a serious relationship and he was being fair to the lady. And yet your friend was just being straightforward and focus. It is good that she knows what kind of guy she is looking for.
ReplyDelete